Thursday, July 19, 2007

Assumptions and Expectations

Ever find yourself in a situation where the reality of the situation was entirely clouded by assumptions and expectations? Why is it we let this cloud of frustration continue to loom over the players in the situation? Wouldn't it be easier to let the assumptions and expectations we hold on to so tightly, fall away. Not an easy process, but wouldn't love, acceptance, and kinship flow much more smoothly? Or should we continue building the dam with logs of expectations and logs of assumptions so that love, acceptance, and kinship only trickle into our lives or not trickle at all? In a perfect world we would not be held to expectations and assumptions, but would be accepted as we are and loved including our faults, which may not even be faults at all. These faults may only be labeled as faults by clouded eyes; an accidental mistake caused by those expectations and assumptions. Why is it that expectations and assumptions cause relationships to end or only be superficial? Why are these expectations and assumptions so important? Why do we let them control our relationships? Why do we find it so hard to let them go? Those assumptions and expectations are seeds of destruction, growing weeds to choke out any hope of reconciliation. Who wants that? Why is it so hard for us to find love in the way things are? Why are we trying to take over the position of potter, instead of remaining the clay? What happened to the idea of ebb and flow and being accepting of where it takes us? I just want to know why it is so hard for us to talk, TALK, instead of ASSUMING? To accept, ACCEPT, instead of EXPECTING? Sigh.... of frustration and exhaustion. Why is it so hard to really open your heart to change and to really learn to love that change? I am so tired of the superficial and fake, the assumption and expectation and non-communication.


Cryssy said...

wow, bad day?? I agree with all you said, but that doesn't make it any easier to change the human nature and spirit. I have wished so many times that I didn't assume things and yet I still do it. I have always had expectations that led me quickly to disappointment. But I still expect things. God made us this way. We learn more about Him in the face of those disappointments and failures (the times someone expected things of us that we didn't fulfill).

Katie said...

Assumptions are definitely human nature and inevitable. They help our brain process life. Expectations, I believe, are something more controllable. If you have too many high expectations, you will be forever disappointed.

The Jacksons said...

Debate time :) !!

Why should we fulfill things that someone else expects of us? Is this relative? What if I expect you to pay me $100 every week and got mad if you didn't? These are the type of expectations I am talking about. The ones that someone has that are ridiculous and selfish.
I agree that assumptions are human nature, I do assume myself. However, I never base my opinion or action on these assumptions. I think a lot of assumptions are based on no communication and then thought to be truth. What if I assume that I have a great relationship with a friend. Then I read something that was written about me by my friend that was hurtful to me, but I took what was written out of context. THen I break all ties with that friend, instead of TALKING with her about it. These assumptions are the ones that cloud the eyes.
Any comments?